A Sweet Getaway

13

Tue, 03 Aug 2010 11:27:58 -0400

Dear Someone I wish could forgive me,

I’m pretty sure you have already forgiven me. To be honest, I’m not really sure how much what I did to you hurt you. But I do know what I did was wrong. We dated and for some reason I just wasn’t feeling like it was working out. When I realized that, I went about breaking up with you the wrong way. You really truly liked me alot and that’s something I didn’t really realize until after the fact. You were one of those guys that trashed and recycled girls like it was nobodys business! And I was not one of those girls you wanted to do that to. I wish I wouldv’e been nicer to you when we broke up. Especially because you did absolutely nothing wrong! So I ask you now, Can you forgive me?

12

Mon, 02 Aug 2010 21:20:18 -0400

Dear person I hate most,

I honestly do not HATE anyone in this world. I feel that hate is a very strong word and has the same strength as love. However you are the person that comes to mind when that word is said. That doesn’t necessarily mean I hate you, but I do strongly dislike you. You pretty much like to cause me pain. I know you think it’s funny but honestly, I don’t laugh one bit. You’re ignorant and have no idea how much you’ve actually hurt me. If you were to actually read this, you would probably think this was a joke and that I was lying about how you make me feel. But I really do feel that you are the one that has caused me the most pain. Whether you know it or not, you are my worst enemy.

11

Sun, 01 Aug 2010 12:41:12 -0400

Dear Deceased Person You Wish You Could Talk To,

I didn’t even meet you until my mother found out you we’re extremely ill and dying. When I first met you, you we’re so thin and could barely speak from lung cancer. I found out so much about you through other people. You loved to paint. Just like me. We seemed to have a lot in common besides that and wish I could’ve met you when you were healthy. Now, there are days where I wonder exactly what you were like as my great grandma.

10

Sun, 01 Aug 2010 12:36:45 -0400

Dear Someone I Don’t Talk to as Much as I Would Like,

We used to be such great friends. Best friends actually. You lived across the street from me until 8th grade. When we reached middle school, we grew apart. We made that change that everyone talks about when you reach a certain age. We made new friends. We weren’t really part of the same “group” of people. We never did much more than a small “hey” in the hallway or occasionally hanging out when our parents wanted to get together. When you moved to Florida, even though we barely talked anymore, it almost felt like something was missing. We see each other once a year, which is nice. But after you leave, I wish we could just go back to old times when we walked across the street to each others houses. We would play baseball with our siblings, play house or whatever else we felt like, and it was always fun! I miss that and I wish we talked still. I never text you or call you or even post a “hello!” on your wall. It’s like we’re not even in each others lives anymore until it’s time for that annual visit. And that’s just not right.

9

Fri, 30 Jul 2010 22:31:33 -0400

Dear Someone I Wish I Could Meet,

Ever since I was little, I have been so interested in baking. Especially cakes. Earlier this year, I became pretty much obsessed with your show, Cake Boss. I know, to you, I’m just another face in the crowd, but your seriously soo cool! You’re talent with cakes is absolutely amazing and I would die (not really) for a chance to meet you, or even just come to the bakery! But honestly, you’re probably way too busy, so I’m cool with that :)

8

Thu, 29 Jul 2010 22:39:39 -0400

Dear Favorite Internet Friend,

What’s funny is, you hate me! And honestly, that’s what makes you my favorite! And to be honest, I think you’re fake. I think someone at my school made a profile for a random guy and made him sexy and just did it to mess around with people. But whatever! It’s cool with me! I love creeping on you on facebook, it’s just great. As you can see, I didnt put much thought or heart into this letter, because its just not necessary. Your funny Jake!

7

Wed, 28 Jul 2010 19:27:04 -0400

Dear Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush,

I don’t even know if this counts. Truth be known, i’ve never even been in love. I guess I’ve never gotten the chance to, but the time will come! We dated in 6th grade. I’m not even sure dated is the correct term, considering we were like 11. But you gave me my first kiss, and to me, that makes you worth writing about :) When I think about it, I can’t help but smile. It happened in a playhouse at the pool with all of our friends around us. And you can’t even lie, it was cute! But I kinda miss those days. We “dated” for almost 6 months, and I’m not gonna joke, you made me sooo happy. But nowadays, you’re part of that “popular” group. We haven’t said a word to eachother in like legit 5 years, and for some reason that’s totally fine with me. I think sometimes in life, it’s better to just leave things the way they are when you know that everyone is satisfied, and that’s what I chose to do in this situation.

6

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 11:48:00 -0400

Dear Stranger,

I saw you one day in a store. You were lightly playing the piano like the world around you was frozen in time and the only thing that mattered was the feeling of your fingers on the keys. The feeling I got when you looked up into my eyes was so different from any feeling I have ever felt. Love at first sight? Not exactly. It was almost as if someone had sewn your mouth shut from the inside and you were trying to tell me something with your eyes. They gave off this sense of urgency, like you were dying inside and needed help. I couldn’t do anything though. I couldn’t say a word. It was like my mouth was also sewn shut and any movement toward you was rejected. I kept walking away from you, hardly looking back. I haven’t seen you in that store again, and wonder were you’ve gone. I will never know what your eyes were trying to tell me that day. Maybe you’re fine, but I know that feeling was something. Something about you is different, but I’m not sure I’ll ever know what it is.

5

Mon, 26 Jul 2010 22:21:33 -0400

Dear Dreams, You confuse me like crazy. You come upon me anytime I drift anywhere near sleep. A lot of the time, you relate so close to reality and what’s happening in my life it’s scary. Sometimes I wonder: Should I follow the choice I made in my dream or do what I think is right? Yeah, your that real. Other times you’re like some Johnny Depp Alice in Wonderland Tim Burton movie that makes no sense. I could wake up in a cold sweat thinking “Thank God that was a dream!” Or sometimes I could awake smiling thinking “Dang it!” Because the dream was something so close to what I would call a perfect life. So Dreams, please help me understand. Are you trying to tell me something? Are you’re crazy twist and turns inside my head meaningful? Or are you just there to confuse me? I guess I have no way of knowing and for some reason that’s alright with me. I mean a little mystery in life can’t hurt, right?

4

Sun, 25 Jul 2010 21:13:57 -0400

Dear Sibling,

I wish I could say you are my best friend, but I can’t. Yet. I feel like we’re getting so much closer as we get older which I love. However, we still argue A LOT and it’s mostly my fault. I take out a lot of my anger on you and don’t deserve that at all. I think this pulls us apart. I’m getting better about controlling that anger though. And I think there are certain times where we have so much fun together, I just wish every time we’re together could be like that. I mean were siblings, so obviously we’re gonna fight. That being said, there is absolutely no doubt that I love you with all my heart and I don’t know what life would be without you. Your crazy, fun-loving and such a great person, and I can’t wait until I can say “my sister is my best-friend.” And all that needs is time.

3

Sat, 24 Jul 2010 22:26:19 -0400

Dear Parents,

Where do I even start? I’m so lucky. Where I have gotten in life is all thanks to you. I wouldn’t be who I am today without you. You watch over me, protect me, care for me and always have my back. I can come to you for anything in the world from school to relationships to fights with friends and you’ll always have an answer for me and do the best you can to help. I know you’re used to the same old “YOU’RE THE GREATEST MOM/DAD EVER” on your Mother’s or Fathers Day card, but it’s completely, 100% true and from my heart. I don’t know if you realize how much I appreciate what you do for me. Sometimes I can get really angry or crabby with you guys and deep down, when its all through, I feel horrible. You don’t deserve that from me. You shouldn’t take that crap from me, you should refuse to help me anymore, but you don’t because you love me. And that’s just what makes you the greatest parents in the world.

2

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 11:40:25 -0400

Dear Crush,

I’m nervous. Not because I’m scared to be around you, but because relationships never go well for me. I’m always the one that ends up getting hurt. To be honest, I don’t know if this is just a one way street, and you have absolutely no interest in me. But we do talk a lot and your so nice to me and we have a lot in common. We haven’t hung out in a long time, but you’ve told me you want to get to know me better. That being said, I’m never the one that comes straight out and says I LIKE YOU and makes a move toward a relationship. So that is up to you. I’ll sit back and wait. Maybe its because I’m a coward or maybe I know deep down you aren’t the one for me. Or maybe I’m afraid if i say something, the feeling won’t be mutual and ruin our friendship. But no matter what, I’m gonna wait. So make a move, or sit back and watch, but I want you to know, I won’t be the first to speak up.

1

Thu, 22 Jul 2010 21:54:32 -0400

Dear Best Friend,

Words can’t describe how much I love you. You mean the absolute world to me, and I don’t know what I’d do without you. I know those are words that everyone seems to say about their best friend, but every single word is true. I can come to you for anything, and I know that in the end, you’ll always be by my side. I don’t see how we could ever drift away from each other. Ever. I hope to God that you’ll be by my side on my wedding day as my maid of honor :] We never fight, we never can lie to each other, and we DEFINITELY can’t go barely a day without seeing each other. I love you, and I promise I’ll be by your side, through thick and thin and I know you’ll return the favor.

Exactly What I Need

Thu, 22 Jul 2010 21:49:09 -0400

This is exactly what I need to get myself writing again.

30 Day Letter Challenge- Each day write a letter to:

Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Unconscious Reality

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 14:43:58 -0400

Sometimes on those long nights where you just can’t get to sleep no matter how many times you flip the pillow or roll over, I think about my life. I mean so does everyone, but I always feel like I’m different. Why am I so unnoticed? I look at these girls that seem to be the “popular” bunch of my class and sit back and think, “why them and not me? How am I any different? That girl’s not even pretty, that girl’s not even nice and here I am on the outside looking in.” I always think that it has to be that they picked the right friends, because there’s always that one girl in those groups who’s so polite and gorgeous and down to earth or at least used to be. And when that one perfect girl becomes friends with someone who is slutty and annoying, well guess what happens to that nice girl? she changes. and with that becomes new people and it keeps building until you get this huge group of slutty whores who suck at school and all they talk about is the guys they banged last weekend or the drugs they got from their “buddy” in college. I’m not saying this because I don’t have friends or anything. It’s just been something on my mind. I’m a nice and decent person with morals and goals in life and get so much less attention then the girls who are sluts and could care less about the life ahead of them. I love my life for what it’s worth, but sometimes I just think about the people in this world and why people like myself go unnoticed. I guess I just don’t offer what the people in the world want. Kindness? Nope. They want sex and drugs and a fun time. I guess I’ll just have to sit back and watch people mature until I do anything to change that.

Photo

Sun, 06 Jun 2010 19:34:26 -0400

decipher reflections from reality.

Sun, 06 Jun 2010 18:06:00 -0400

So I figured since I love to write, this would be a perfect place to throw my thoughts and feelings. No one will probably read it, and that’s fine with me. I just would like a place where I can kind of get away when I’m frustrated and angry or sad, and writing always seems like the solution. A blank screen or piece of paper will always be there for me. It will never give me crap or get mad at the things i say. It will only be there to listen. Although it will never give me advice or talk back, who’s to say that a bad thing? The truth hurts, and we can all think of a time in our lives where if we just didn’t hear the truth, we would’ve gone on in our lives and felt so much better about ourselves. That’s where our self confidence starts to break down. The truth. And for those people that seem so self confident, the truth just doesn’t hurt them or get to them as much. Or maybe they just don’t hear the truth very often, because their peers don’t chose to tell them. They would rather hide it and talk behind their backs. I’m still not sure whats better, living knowing the truth about what everyone thinks about you whether its good or bad and feeling worse about yourself or living like life is bliss, but not knowing the truth about anything that’s happening around you while everyone is talking about you when your not looking.

“All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them.”